Teen v Eating Disorder
The subject of my recent article has asked me to keep this anonymous for her protection.
After asking her a series of questions, I had asked her for a quote on her eating disorder or on anorexia as a whole: “Anorexia is not a healthy lifestyle for anyone to lead. That may sound hypocritical but, if I had received the help and attention I needed when i was 12, my life would have changed for the better. I guess what I’m trying to say is don’t be afraid to ask for help.”
How old were you when you began starving yourself?
I was twelve. Someone very dear to me passed away and I started to not care what happened to me.
How long did your ED last?
Technically speaking, I still have an eating disorder. But as far as anyone around me is concerned, I am at my happiest and healthiest.
How long did it take for loved ones to notice or ask?
I was about fifteen the first time anyone ever actually noticed. I went three years of my parents, whom live in the same house as myself, and sister(who lives in a separate home) thinking I was perfectly fine. I think that if anyone had noticed sooner, I wouldn’t have self-destructed as greatly as I had.
What sorts of lies and excuses would you use to avoid eating?
Often times I would just tell my family I had eaten earlier because I was playing sports and often home alone. I would also tell them that I just wasn’t hungry or I would “eat later”. I was only called out on that lie one time and I told them “I never said how much later, I just said ‘later’”.
What is the worst effect of your ED?
The worst effect of the ED is the distance. I often distance myself from everyone to avoid the questions and stares, but now, I no longer distance myself as much. I have a boyfriend, I spend most of my lunches with him or my sister who is now a freshman in high school, or other friends. My boyfriend has not quite yet figured it out but he suspects, we’ve been dating for almost a month now and I haven’t eaten a single thing in front of him.
Did the thought ever occur to you that what you were doing was wrong?The thought did occur; often. After reading your blog, Letting Ana Go, i realized what i was doing to my body but, i still dont have the proper mentality to stop. Nor do I want to. I want to lose weight, I want to look good for my boyfriend. I want to be able to fit into my prom dress in April and not worry about whether or not I have fat-rolls or extra skin hanging over the side of my dress.